My nickname is kelly. I'm a 40yr old mom of two beautiful little girls, two guinea pigs and a hamster(Rocky)~ICU nurse~cancer survivor~recovering addict~ex-smoker~living
in Calgary, Alberta.....
.... or...
just another sheep searching for the meaning of life and everlasting
happiness....
bahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!
When i find it i'll be sure to let you know though ;)~~~~~~~~
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Updates/Announcements
Currently i don't know if i'm going to maintain
my blog on a daily basis but i am going to blog ACC (cancer) updates - the
original reason for creating my webpage and blog. *Hugs* to my friends and i wish
anyone looking for information about cancer on behalf of themselves or friends
and family all the best on your journey. ~kelly sXe
"With happy
thoughts,
faith and trust and
a sprinkling of fairy dust"
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Monday, September 16, 2002
Well here is my Monday Mission... i dunno why but i don't seem to have any clear answers to most of the questions lately whether it's the Monday Mission or the Friday Five or whatever... maybe i just do better with the "what kind of shampoo do you use?" questions... :P
PromoGuy's Monday Mission 2.37
1. Do you have a favorite piece of poetry or prose written by someone else? Care to share it?
The lover sleeps and amid his dreams
His angel comes on sunlit beams.
To waken him with kisses sweet,
For her love for him is oh so deep.
She wakes him with her caresses light
Upon his skin and smiles so bright.
And in her eyes, he sees the love
She feels for him neath stars above.
He comes to her to gently place,
Kisses upon her neck and face.
To caress her body and touch her soul.
For together two become a whole.
The love they make is deep and true
And in this embrace their love renew.
When all is done and all's been said,
Upon her breasts he rests his head.
And hears her heart beat for him alone.
A greater love, he's never known.
Author... ?
2. In High School, did you enjoy creative writing? Do you currently do any other writing in addition to your Blog?
Absolutely not... creative writing would have been my worst nitemare... kinda still is. :P And no... other than the odd email and a few scratches in a real life paper journal i don't do any other writing unless those little stick it notes count.
3. Have you ever noticed that the Blog entries you least expect to get the most comments do, and those you expect to generate a lot of feedback don't? Which Blog entry of yours surprised you by getting a lot of comments? Which one did you think would generate a lot but didn't?
Not particularly. I don't write anything too controversial and it's mostly my good friends or people looking for info on cancer cruising by here. When i'm having a bad day i notice more people respond which is really sweet and makes me feel good.
4. Sometimes you get a chance to make a lifestyle change that has a huge impact on the course your life takes. That is, a moment where something became very clear to you, and that realization changed your life, such as: the need to leave a relationship, to stop an addiction, to bond with someone, to start a new career, and so on. Have you ever had an "awakening" moment in your life?
Quite a few... where to start. One of the first i remember was when i was 29 and decided to get back into shape. I think i'd done next to nothing for about 8 yrs since i was 21. I'd been busy with school and work etc. Ever since that year i've known that part of the secret to being happy etc is exercise and i've never given up trying to be in the best shape possible since then... albeit with varying degrees of success... :P
One of the other major lifestyle changes was quitting smoking. I think it was when i was pregnant with my littlest one... about 4 yrs ago now... i quit smoking and for the first time i felt i could really do it. I was 34. I'd been smoking since i was 17. For the first time in my adult life i experienced what it was like to live without smoking and the freedom was incredible... to actually make decisions not based on getting nicotine was amazing. I had no idea before then how many things i was doing or not doing in my life simply because i smoked although i think i suspected. This is something else i will never give up trying... regardless of how many times i fall off the wagon i will never give up trying to be a non-smoker.
Finally the cancer... i wouldn't exactly call this a lifestyle change but it has had a pretty big impact on my life. That impact is the gift that comes with getting cancer or any other potentially fatal disease... and if you can beat it then you are truly one of the luckiest. When your life is threatened life itself becomes so much simpler. All the everyday mundane problems you worry and deal with drop away and you're left with what is truly important. Everything becomes clear... your priorities line themselves up in exactly the right order. You stop worrying about the future... rsp's... getting old... or whatever it is we generally concern ourselves with and you think about now. You enjoy now and you live in the moment as Oprah would say. This feeling stays with many people their whole lives while others like myself have to work to remember it and to keep living in the moment.
5. Then there are other times where you can have a huge impact on someone else's life. You suggest they see a doctor, stop them from taking that last drink, or maybe just say some kind words at the moment. Have you made a lasting positive impact on the life of someone else?
One of the wonderful things about being a nurse... and you won't catch me saying there are too many things wonderful about nursing unfortunately... is the fact you get to help people in so many ways and get paid to do it to boot. Working ICU this was especially true. The patients were often seriously ill... facing death, dissibility, disfigurement or many many months of rehab...the patients and their families were especially in need of support. Over the years you touch many people's lives... some you bond with a little more than others... some you spend months with some just a few hours... but many you impact in a positive way... often times not even realising that some little thing you did for them made all the difference.
Belonging to a 12-step program provides similar opportunities. While helping yourself you are helping others. Many people in the program are great at letting you know when something you've said has had an especially positive impact. The same is true of my webpage/blog... every once in awhile i get an email from someone with cancer or a lump somewhere letting me know how helpful it has been to them. Those are the greatest emails to get. :)
6. Are there any charities or organizations which you support? How did you come to be involved with them?
Depends how you define support. Financially i think we've supported just about everything and everyone out there at some point in time. A few years back I started giving to anyone that came to the door asking for money because i figured anyone that got off their ass going door to door asking for money deserved to get some. When we were a little more financially stable i started giving to all local charities that phoned me.(those within Calgary)
Since hubby and i both got sick i've cut back fearing that we may be the ones needing charity. I still give to anyone that comes to the door (man i hope none of you have my address). Financially we support a child in another country through the Christian Children's Fund of Canada. We've been doing that since our oldest daughter was born and they are about the same age. I would have liked to do that with a second child when my second child was born but we haven't yet.
It is so easy to give money and not so easy to give your time though... so although money is obviously vital to charities i feel it's a bit of a cop out on my part as it requires no effort at all. I was hoping to donate blood but that's not possible if you've had cancer before. The mother daughter run we're doing for the women's heart and stroke fund requires some effort on our part and it's a good, healthy event for all of us. I'd like to do more for the cancer society, the MS society and sarcoidosis in the future for obvious reasons. I'm involved in a 12-step program that allows me to give of my time and abilities occasionally. That's about it.
7. Care to collaborate with me? Help me out and write the rest of this poem:
I drifted though a dream last night,
visions full of colors bright.
My thoughts began to drift to you,
and in an instant we were two.
I touched your hand,
We began to blend,
Filled with a feeling
that should have no end....
I think not... :P
BONUS: Hey cutie, what's up with this attitude?
Attitude??? What fricken attitude???!!... lol.
susi
7:36 PM
"I have heard it all my life,
A voice calling a name i recognized as my own.
Sometimes it comes as a soft bellied whisper.
Sometimes it holds an edge of urgency.
But always it says:
Wake up my love.
You are walking asleep.
There's no safety in that."
- -- Oriah Mountain Dreamer
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"You're an interesting species... an interesting mix.
You're capable of such
beautiful dreams...and such horrible nightmares."
- -- Contact
C A N C E R S T U F F
accoi - adenoid cystic
carcinoma organization international
