My nickname is kelly. I'm a 40yr old mom of two beautiful little girls, two guinea pigs and a hamster(Rocky)~ICU nurse~cancer survivor~recovering addict~ex-smoker~living
in Calgary, Alberta.....
.... or...
just another sheep searching for the meaning of life and everlasting
happiness....
bahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!
When i find it i'll be sure to let you know though ;)~~~~~~~~
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Updates/Announcements
Currently i don't know if i'm going to maintain
my blog on a daily basis but i am going to blog ACC (cancer) updates - the
original reason for creating my webpage and blog. *Hugs* to my friends and i wish
anyone looking for information about cancer on behalf of themselves or friends
and family all the best on your journey. ~kelly sXe
"With happy
thoughts,
faith and trust and
a sprinkling of fairy dust"
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Tuesday, September 10, 2002
Monday Mission 2.36 via PromoGuy dot net
1. Where were you and what was happening in your life the moment when you first became aware of what was happening at the World Trade Center in New York City last September 11th? What was the first thing you did when you heard the news?
I sat down at my pc at 730am mountain time/930am New York time. I had just logged on to icq and one of my bestfriends online living in Texas messaged me and said the US was being attacked. A tiny part of me didn't believe it but my head couldn't come up with a reason for someone to joke about something so serious... as i was trying to make sense out of it i was running for the remote and turned on CNN. What then unfolded were the most shocking, heart breaking and horrifying events i'd ever seen.
I figured out later that as the first plane hit i was downstairs working out... as the second plane hit i was showering. It just seemed so strange to be doing those things and to be totally oblivious to the nightmare that had just unfolded in other people's lives.
I imagine i must have phoned my husband as soon as i learned some of what was going on and some of the shock had worn off. I can't remember if i did now or if i reached him. It seems hard to believe but i must have had to drive the kids to school that day. I can't imagine having to leave the house while all of this was going on.
The most frustrating part i do remember. I had a whole bunch of cancer related appointments at the hospital that day when all i wanted to do was sit in front of CNN. I went from department to department and it was the same wherever i went... all the tv's were on... it was totally quiet and everyone..nurses..doctors..techs..were all glued to CNN.
I had to have a bunch of dental xrays done... molds for my fluoride trays made... a CT... and the sim(simulation) for my radiation... sorta like a practise session for the real thing. They try the mask on etc and make all their markings. I remember laying on the table... it was like a hard CT table... i wasn't sure if i was in a rad room or a CT room... i didn't really know what was going on after they got me bolted down to the table and left me alone
. I started thinking "oh god they're not gonna do the rad now are they???". I was freaking cause i thought they were gonna nuke me... and then i realised that that is what i was there for and it really didn't matter if they started right then or the next day... lolol. It's funny how your natural instinct to run from any type of radiation kicks in especially when you've been a nurse and are used to moving away from xray's etc... totally forgetting you're there to be nuked!!!
2. When those truly responsible for the attack are apprehended, what do you think would be the most fitting form of justice?
I'm not a supporter of the death penalty but i wouldn't object in this case. Guaranteed life in prison is i suppose the only other alternative?
3. This will probably be much like when our parents respond to "Where were you when JFK was shot?"- an event never forgotten by those who were there. But how do you think the history books should present the 9-11 attacks? Should it be included for all future generations? How can we truly convey the shock, the outrage, the emotions and pain of that day to the children of our children?
The same way JFK's generation conveyed the shock of his death. They will see it for themselves by seeing the events and by hearing our generation talk of it.
4. No one in that building, in the Pentagon, or on the planes (other than the terrorists) knew that 9-11 would be their last day to be alive. For me, it brought home the reality that I could be gone at anytime, without any warning. Now, I really want each day to have some value. Did the events of 9-11 bring about a change in the way you live your life?
My life had already changed in June of the same year when i was diagnosed with cancer. Your priorities become instantly crystal clear. What is truly important in life becomes crystal clear. It's a good feeling actually. Many minor worries and concerns disappear in a heartbeat and all you are left with is the truly important things. 911 however made having cancer seem like a walk in the park. Somewhat surprising how even cancer can be made to seem like nothing.
5. Several who loved to fly in planes will not step foot in one anymore. Many parents are more protective of their children. A year later, do you find yourself feeling more secure than back then? Or is it just a matter of time before something else happens?
I feel more secure... not sure i have any reason to. It helps not living in the US... altho i don't believe any country is safe from these lunatics. I believe it is just a matter of time before something happens.
6. The best way for me to honor the those impacted by the attack will be to refrain from any media that day. No papers, no radio and especially no television. Others will light candles, and others will attend special services. What, if anything, will you do to personally reflect on the tragedy?
Probably the exact opposite... i'll watch everything they air tomorrow. I have watched a little already and it brings back the shock, horror and sadness of that day. Not sure that is what i want... but to not watch is to try and forget for me... and that doesn't seem right either.
7. One of the visuals that touched me the most were the walls and walls full of hand made "Missing" posters. What image will you always have in your mind when you recall the events of 9-11?
Unfortunately the thing that will stick with me the most are the people jumping from the towers.
BONUS: Who's gonna come around when you break?
My g*d i actually recogize this one... that's a first... but arrrrrrrrgh i can't remember what the hell song it is.
susi
9:54 AM
"I have heard it all my life,
A voice calling a name i recognized as my own.
Sometimes it comes as a soft bellied whisper.
Sometimes it holds an edge of urgency.
But always it says:
Wake up my love.
You are walking asleep.
There's no safety in that."
- -- Oriah Mountain Dreamer
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"You're an interesting species... an interesting mix.
You're capable of such
beautiful dreams...and such horrible nightmares."
- -- Contact
C A N C E R S T U F F
accoi - adenoid cystic
carcinoma organization international
